Wednesday, July 13, 2016

30 Before 30: Day 24 - Dreams

I often have very strange and extremely vivid dreams. I also used to have a lot of deja vu. It's not quite as common now but it still happens. But my dream life has intensified.

Here's an example of a dream I had this year, unedited from when I wrote it down:

Dream Tuesday, April 19, 2016

It started out as a justice mission of some kind. We were in some kind of huge building. I had an M16 again for the first time since the military. First I was on a metal walkway a few floors up looking down on an open area. My comrades and I readied ourselves and the people in charge told me what I needed to do. When the people started coming I soon found myself on a shooting rampage. I moved throughout the compound. At one point an SUV was coming towards us when I was outside the building. I shot out the tires. Another point I shot a driver in the head of another vehicle from a distance. Another point I shot someone in the shoulder without killing them. A bunch of these things happened.

Then suddenly none of my comrades were around and I was still going on this shooting spree. Very soon I was a wanted man. I was on the run. I found myself in a building, which looked like Room 3 of the church I grew up in back home, and I was grabbing clothes, trying to avoid anyone noticing my presence. I packed up quickly, throwing things in a backpack, knowing I needed to get away quickly. Once I packed up, I started to sneak out.

a good bit of time had passed and I was walking down the street, avoiding the gaze of people, because I knew I couldn’t go to jail. It was a sunny day, spring it seemed. I passed a couple kids without looking at them.

Then it was years later and I was at a house. Next door was my old house and I needed to grab clothes from there. I walked across the lawn of the current house and a little girl sat on a swing, her long hair covering her face and flowing down to her knees, head bowed. As I passed her head came up and back, face slightly up toward the sky and her mouth opened wide in a circle, a horrific sight, and a terrible moaning sound escaped her mouth. I ran to the other house, crouching as if that would help me not be seen. I went in and rummaged through the clothes. Not feeling I really had time, I ended up just grabbing a bunch without thinking about what I was taking. When I went back to the first house the girl was still there and she did the same thing. I seemed to imitate her sound as a response, seemingly out of trying to diminish the fear. She continued her open mouthed unnatural moan and as I walked away I flipped her off with both hands. She seemed to laugh in a way. In the middle of all this I realized when I first saw the girl that she was the child of something that had happened earlier, some demented source of something wrong and I think I had something to do with the things creation.

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